Project Self

I’ve decided to do what comes naturally to me, after years of managing multiple projects throughout my career. I’m going to approach this as yet another one and I will call it Project Self. I even had a meeting with self and developed a strategy to implement Project Self.

Project Self’s overall strategy is to maximize the days I feel good and eat lots of protein, get lots of calories, hydrate, walk, listen to my body and rest throughout the day, stay positive and express love and appreciation to friends, family and most of all to Scott.  He is my rock.

Part one of Project Self’s strategy is to meditate as soon as I wake up, usually around 5:00 am. At 5:30 a.m. I make a protein smoothie with organic whey powder, orange juice, fresh ginger, peanut butter, banana, blood orange, or fresh papaya and flax seed. I get about 28 grams of protein from this smoothie and it gets my wheels rolling. Around 9:00 am I have either scrambled eggs with cottage cheese, or steel cut oatmeal with an egg beaten in (sounds gross, but it’s more protein) molasses, cinnamon, chopped prunes, walnuts and whole milk. I eat small high protein snacks throughout the day.  Lunch and dinner are steamed veggies and protein or a soup. I use organic, free range, non-gmo foods. For the most part my diet is bland, but I’m able to cook for myself which makes me very happy. Eating gives me energy and energy let’s me move. Plus, I’ve been able to maintain my weight which is good news.

Part two of Project Self’s strategy is to keep my body in motion. I take as many walks as needed to put me at 3.5 - 4.0 miles. I’ve even managed to walk the day after chemo! Because my diet is so bland and my stomach so fussy, I’ve asked friends to walk me and the dogs, rather than bring a meal. I cannot pick up dog poop and everyone I’ve asked has been willing to take on that task and for that I am so grateful. My two Aussies get so sad when there is no one to walk with me and they have to stay home.

Part three of Project Self’s strategy is how I deal with the chemo. Iwill not let it make me fearful, anxious or worried days before I go in for an infusion. I must admit, I have some work to do on this one. I am getting 4 months of chemo one day per week on Friday. Yesterday was chemo number 4 with a double cocktail of taxol and carboplatin, which I get every 3rd week and then taxol every two weeks in between the double cocktail. I’ve been tolerating the taxol infusion. All week I worried the double cocktail would kick my butt, but so far it hasn’t. Part of the strategy is if chemo should at any point kick my butt, I will let it for a day or two and then I will get right back up and begin my strategy all over again.

This is something my friend Kathy just shared with me:

Less head, more heart.

Less think, more feel.

Less do, more be.

Hmm, maybe that should be the Vision Statement for Project Self?

One month of chemo under the belt, three more to go. I’m thinking Project Self has a viable strategy. 

Susanna’s beloved, lifelong friend Lynda Brown, who had driven in from Bozeman the day before to be with her through chemo.